Tabloid dug up a random story out of Thailand about the "vagina tree," which correctly predicted the lottery based on some strange markings* on the trunk. The numbers were simple — 008 — but they worked on the next go-around, and everyone in the village is rich. Or, well, richer — since they probably didn't all win $50 million Thai baht.
(*That, for all you men, is called the g-spot.)
Although the tree is nearly 100 years old, locals say it only caught their attention when it recently developed a “fist-sized sparkling” mound on top of a two-foot-long gash in its trunk. They believe the bizarre combination forms a resemblance to a vagina.
Next, they'll find 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42 on the door of its hatch.