Game Time
by Corrado Dalco

/photography/
Dating Advice from . . . Scuba Divers
by Meghan Pleticha

Q: What has diving taught you about dating?
A: Sometimes things will happen unexpectedly, and you've gotta throw off your tank and bolt for the surface. /regulars/
Dating Confessions
by You

"I'm skinny and although a lot of women are jealous, most men actually prefer average girls..."
Scanner
by Emily Farris

Today on Nerve's culture blog: Pack the bug spray and sunscreen. We're going to gay summer camp.
Screengrab
by Various

Today in Nerve's film blog: What's your favorite Will Smith movie? If any?
The Modern Materialist
by Various

Almost everything you want. Today: Have more fun in the dark.
61 Frames Per Second
by John Constantine

Today in Nerve's videogame blog: We get misty on the Chrono Cross soundtrack and ponder the return of Chrono Trigger.
The Remote Island
by Bryan Christian

Today on Nerve's TV blog: Dance, Hipster, Dance! Plus: our latest NewsCrush — and why one army brat is breaking up with Army Wives.
Miss Information
by Erin Bradley

Wisdom in 150 words or less. /advice/
Wanderlust
by Matt Gross

A New York Times travel columnist surveys his global network of "mistresses." /personal essays/
Horoscopes
by Nerve staff

Your week ahead. /advice/

 
Friday Film    

Review: Diary of a Mad Black Woman

promotion
About halfway through Diary of a Mad Black Woman, you receive your first hint that this movie may not be what you thought you signed up for: Love-worn Helen lists her new boyfriend's perks via voiceover: "He's strong...he's kind...he's Christian..."
    It's a subtle reference, but only the opening volley in what quickly accelerates into evangelistic nuclear meltdown. If you're unfamiliar with the play that it's based on — in which a woman learns on the eve of her eighteenth anniversary that her husband is kicking her out of their mansion — you're probably not expecting an onslaught of faith-based agitprop. For the unprepared, Diary feels a bit like trickery, warming you up with fun handgun-wielding senior citizens and alcohol-and-prescription-drugs hijinx, before it dives crucifix-first into redemption, prayer, a Jacuzzi baptismal, and a final scene ripped from the traditional-values playbook where, in the house of God before a howling choir, a heroin addict casts off her tourniquet and a cripple literally walks.
    The script calls for overwrought performances, and Kimberly Elise and Steve Harris turn them in handily as the angelic wife and pure-evil husband. Writer Tyler Perry is formulaically amusing as fat grandma Madea, and Cicely Tyson oozes pious intimacy. But decent performances throughout can't squelch the overly simplistic good/evil paradigm that suffocates the film, and those viewers not comfortable with the Jesus Saves clusterfuck run the risk of feeling alienated — and lectured — with righteous indignation. — Will Doig
Date DVD #21: Nausicaa
  Certain dates — ones I've ruined, anyway — will hum along, through drinks, through dinner, and handholding during the movie, only to have the romantic machinery grind to a halt as the credits roll. It's at that point that the anxiety attack sets in: Am I being tested? If I don't absolutely love Fellini's Satyricon does that mean I'm getting dumped? If I don't have a pithy observation to make about euthanasia and Hilary Swank, will I be judged?
    Sometimes, there's nothing better than an argument over movies, but for the easily ratttled, it can be reassuring to pick a nice pocket of cinema on which almost anyone can agree: Catwoman, bad. Hayao Miyazaki, brilliant.
    Miyazaki, the Japanese animator behind Spirited Away and Princess Mononoke, is beloved by nearly all humans — and, by the looks of his holistic films, all beasts, too. His reputation will only be burnished by the DVD debut of three films (The Cat Returns, Porco Rosso, and Nausicaa) previously unavailable here in the States. The Cat Returns is a simple film about a girl who gets friendly with talking felines; it delivers a great girl-power kick at the end. Porco Rosso is more for the boys: it follows a talking pig fighter-pilot who cracks wry jokes and tromps from scene to scene, sniffing up the scenery. But Nausicaa, the story of a tough princess who saves the world from war and giant toxic beetles, is a brilliant piece of future fantasy. A predecessor to Princess Mononoke in theme and style, it's the kind of film that's so inarguably good, you and your date will both grin and gush and completely agree with each other. At least this once. — Logan Hill

 

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